Are You Getting In Your Own Way?

While reflecting on some lessons learned from last year, I went through a mental catalog from a recent home improvement project and the experiences that my husband and I shared during that process. We came to the realization that if you implement good project management skills, and hire good people, you should get your desired results. However, it cannot happen without pushing some people’s limits on occasion, and having a positive mindset.

People who say “It cannot be done” should not interrupt those are doing it.

unattributed adage

One of the members of the team we hired, kept repeating, “That can’t be done and most definitely cannot be done on your prescribed deadline.” There were many unnecessary delays following this advice.

What he meant was, “I don’t have time, this is the way I move things along, I’m the expert and things cannot change.” We questioned the status quo and proceeded to beat our deadline for the project without imposing false limitations.

How Does That Apply to YOU?

So that story was an easy example of someone getting in the way of something you need to get done. But what if we get in our own way?

Most of us make a habit of asking ourselves if we are walking our talk. So, I wondered when I got in the way of my own growth and advancement. I’m sure I have at some point or another.

As with everybody else, sometimes I let fear rule me. We all do it with ourselves and even those we love. The evolutionary purpose of fear is to promote survival but really when was the last time we were chased by a lion?

The imagined dragons that we wrestle with daily come from core beliefs that need to be disentangled. Pay attention to your triggers for they lead you to the rope that hangs onto your core beliefs. Short of disintegrating our maladaptive thought patterns and behaviors with a psychotherapist you can engage in “What if?”

How to Combat Fear

So, what is the antidote to the human condition of fear? Hope.

Hope is the thing with feathers.

Emily Dickinson

Hope is everything. Hope enables visualization, patience, questioning, a positive state of mind, and a creative feeling-state. It creates desire and enables the enjoyment of anticipation. It is a driving force that propels you to do better for yourself and others. It is our natural state. It makes life worth living.

But how do we keep ourselves in a hopeful state? Perhaps by digging into the truth of the core of our human nature. If fear is limitation, then hope speaks of growth. Hope is the antidote for getting in our own way.

Like it’s cousin, love, hope unifies and links us closer while fear comes between our connection with ourselves and others.

How Do We Get to Hope?

Get to hope by taking small habitual steps. Make it a habit to point your flashlight in a positive direction. Surround yourself with hopeful people. Be the beacon and sometimes receive the light from others.

Strengthening this muscle takes daily exercise and purposefulness. But the benefits you reap from living a hopeful life pay in dividends by rewarding you with good physical and mental health, helping you make better connections with the people in your life and motivating you to go on doing better and being better.

So if you want to flip the switch?

Ask yourself, “What if there was hope?” and see how your world changes right before your eyes.